Benjamin Jacoby

January 5th is a day that changed my world and left a hole in my heart that will never be filled. It is the day that my sweet daddy left us after a short but hard-fought battle demonstrating until the very end just how strong he was and his will to live. 

Dad was born in Carteret, New Jersey to Nathaniel and Helen Jacoby and was the middle child of three. He had a curiosity for how things worked from an early age. He would tell stories of how he would get in trouble for taking apart the lawn mower or the vacuum cleaner just to see how they worked and whether he could put them back together again. As a young man, he enjoyed building and flying model airplanes and his love of airplanes would remain throughout his life.

Eager for a change, my dad left the East Coast at the age of 18 and headed to Sunny Southern California where he met my mother, Joyce, shortly after arriving there. They married on February 1st 1952, in Glendale, California, and were married 60 years at the time of her passing in 2012.

In July of 1952, my dad enlisted in the Air Force where he remained until 1960.

Once discharged from the Air Force, mom and dad moved to Northern California. The geography in Northern California with Its open spaces and rice fields called to my dad. It made for perfect conditions for pheasant hunting, and Sacramento in particular, boasting multiple rivers, made it ideal for fishing. Both of which were lifelong passions of dads.

Mom and dad made such good friends once settling into Sacramento. Dad joined a bowling league and developed a real passion for bowling and it turns out he was pretty good at it. He acquired quite the collection of bowling trophies that validated his skills. He continued bowling for many years until he physically could not do it anymore.

Dad took a job with Aerojet where he worked for about 10 years until taking a job with the City of Sacramento first as a plan checker and then as a building inspector. He retired from the City in 1991.

I was born after nearly 13 years of marriage. A shock but a happy surprise… or at least that’s what I was told. Mom was worried how my dad would handle this twist, a baby suddenly thrown into his world. But dad was a daddy from the start. Stories shared over the years of how he would sleep next to my bassinette when I was sick, or how he would call the babysitter while out with friends at Caper Club just to have them check to see if I was still breathing.

I have many childhood memories of our quality time together. Whether it was missing school to go pheasant hunting, taking horseback riding lessons with me because of my love for horses, spending time at our cabin in Downieville with mom and dad’s best friends Jerry and Juanita and their daughter Cindy, hauling all of my Sacramento friends to South Land Park for water balloon fights, and backyard swim parties for my birthday, or just sitting and listening to Country music.

Moving to Rocklin in 1977 brought about my dad’s love for golf which he played well into his 80’s. When my mom passed away, I was worried that he would be lonely. But dad stayed active and engaged in life volunteering as a Marshall at several golf courses, volunteering with Kiwanis, fishing, golfing, playing poker, and of course watching his beloved 49ers.

The consummate joker and kidder, dad never took anything too seriously. He could certainly push buttons. But he could take as well as he gave. He had a good nature, almost always smiling and happy. It was important to him to be social and active. He hosted poker games at his house for years and enjoyed that so much. He was up for just about anything.

One of his favorite things to do when he was spending time alone though was to sit and watch a good Western movie. He loved John Wayne and the Old West. He loved Country music. We often joked that he must have been a Cowboy in a prior life.

As dad entered his 90’s, he remained independent and stayed interested in technology and was always willing to learn more in order to stay connected and relevant. He required little assistance from me. Our quality time together continued. We spoke every day…often multiple times a day, we spent most weekends together, we traveled together. Time spent with my dad was not out of some sort of obligation but rather was because I simply enjoyed his company. He was a part of my everyday life. He was my friend.

Thank you to all the friends who became dad’s “village” and who helped keep him remaining active, engaged, happy and independent and who were of great support for me over the past few months in particular. 

Sharon, you and my dad have so much history. Your friendship spanning decades. You were such a special companion to him over the past 12 years. He enjoyed your company so much. Your easygoing nature and your care and compassion for others and for animals were just a few things that he admired about you. He enjoyed your family, your routine of watching AGT and the Voice together and he was happy just spending time with you. He was so thankful for you.

Tony, you were an amazing friend, neighbor, and travel companion who was always willing to lend my dad a helping hand with whatever came up.

Sonny, you were such a great companion for my dad. Thank you for the quality time you gave to my dad.…fishing, backgammon games, thunder valley excursions to name a few. 

Dale, your love of the 49ers rivaled that of my dad’s and that is hard to do. Thank you for giving him your time…all of the Super Bowl parties together over the years. He enjoyed watching every game with you.

Jerry, you had the longest friendship with Dad. Memories of the times that you and he spent together as young men carried him throughout his entire life. He thought of you as a brother.

Those left behind to mourn his loss include myself and my husband Dennis who my dad admired in so many ways…especially his wit and intelligence, his niece and nephew Debbie and David and their families back East, my mom’s side of the family including her sister Aunt Betty and my cousins Mark, Dee, Cheryl, Todd, Brad and Adam and their families in Idaho and California. Dad truly had so many fond memories of the time spent with all of you over the years in Bodega Bay, at the Indianapolis 500, deep sea fishing, Bandon Oregon, Lake Tahoe, The Redwoods, Maine, and of course, the bucket list fishing trip to Alaska just to name a few.

Please join me as we celebrate the life of this special father, friend, and human being. Please feel free to share stories and memories. Please come dressed casual as that’s exactly how dad would have wanted it. Please RSVP to me by text by March 1st to let me know if you will be able to attend as well as the number of people in your party as we are providing a catered lunch after the celebration of life ceremony.